Today was an interesting one, I had to present my work to everyone in my faculty at the 'ideas and drinks' session we hold fortnightly. Luckily, with everything being so busy lately, I didn't have time to get to my normal level of crazy nervous and fret about what I would present for hours (read: days) on end. Instead, I decided to simply discuss what I've been grappling with lately in relation to my thesis (place vs space), and as always does when you finally let go and just let it happen, everything went very well. I had some really great feedback and a lot of interesting questions that have still got my brain buzzing. I love those moments, the occasional assurances that despite any lingering feelings of fear that I may have completely derailed my life by leaving a guaranteed opportunity for gainful employment in psychology to pursue a PhD in something so obscure as 'sense of place' the decision was, without a doubt, the right one. Somehow, this whole writing thing, it just fits, and everything else, well, I believe it will look after itself. Because, even with all of my newly accquired critical thinking skills, I still believe in destiny. We're all here for a reason, and if we're brave, the life we're meant to lead will unfold before us. So, this is me being brave (alternately with being scared...but then brave again...for a little *smile*) Okay, that's definitely enough philosophy for tonight. But I will leave you with this speech by Nelson Mandela which I find absolutely inspiring and read whenever I'm feeling unsure...
"Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness, that most frightens us. We ask ourselves, who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, and fabulous? Actually, who are you not to be? You are a child of God. Your playing small doesn't serve the world. There's nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won't feel insecure around you. We are all meant to shine, as children do. We are born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us. It's not just in some of us, it's in everyone. And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others."
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Sense of place is such a tricky thing.... so important and so difficult to pin down. You know it when you feel it and you know when it's lacking... but from a desidner's perspective - what can you do to help create it?
I think it's awesome that that's part of your research! And yay you for presenting and not fretting!
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